“Nope. Been there, done that. It hurt.” I pushed back from my desk and stood. “So what that she sent me a smile and message? It’s not worth it.”

One failed long distance relationship doesn’t mean all will fail.

“Whatever,” I said, as I paced my music studio under the house, annoyed at the small, calm voice that was thwarting my arguments. “Okay, so lets say for the sake of argument I did learn a thing or two in my last relationship; this situation is totally different. This girl lives thousands of kilometres away – in a different country! The potential issues and difficulties are endless.”

True, but she is a quality young lady. Everything you have ever looked for.

I sank into the couch and stared at the beautiful, smiling face on my computer screen.“I know, I know,” I said. “Maybe it wouldn’t hurt to respond, see where things go.”

Exactly, you can just be friends.

“Saipan is pretty close to Australia, I doubt it’d cost much to fly there if things did progress well.” I had only recently landed a stable job after six months of searching and hundreds of applications, so finances were tight.

What’s the worst that could happen?

That was a good question, what was the worst? I could think of a lot of things. Among them: getting my heart broken, again. Returning to the computer, I closed down the dating site and fired up a computer game, attempting to forget about bhodge11. No matter how hard I tried, her captivating smile and profile would not leave me in peace. Nor would that irritating little voice in my head.

20 minutes later, my team surrendered, and kindly informed me how to uninstall the game.

Why even be on a dating website if you’re going to ignore the great sounding women?

Sighing, I opened the site back up and reread bhodge11’s profile. She certainly was a great sounding woman, not to mention a great looking woman.

Oh, what the heck. I opened my inbox and browsed the selection of “smiles” that the website offered to us poor, free users as a way of communicating interest. Finding an appropriate message to go with the smile, I hit send. Maybe now I would be able to focus on my game and win.

Yeah, no.

What you don’t know can’t hurt you. Right?

To be perfectly honest, I was terrified of messaging Brittany. I was sure it would end in a flaming mess, just like my last long distance relationship.

If I had known the cost of flights between Aus and Saipan from the get-go, I’m doubtful I’d have returned her smile. I assumed they’d be cheap; turned out they were about $1600 a pop.

If I had known how many thousands of dollars it would cost and how much stress it would be to migrate countries, I also don’t know if I’d have been game to get to know Brittany…

… Thank you God that I didn’t know any of that!

Now that I know what an amazing woman Brittany is, I would choose to do it all again if I had to.

I’m grateful God gave us time to establish a solid relationship before the struggles of closing the distance began.


This post was written for the LDRBN.
Inspired by the Distance Prompt.
The post on LDRBN.

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